In this life, quite frequently, there is a struggle to find your our voice. Many times, I find myself in a conversation, and whatever topic comes up, I seem to find another’s opinion settled in the recesses of my brain, and instead of crafting a thoughtful reply, I regurgitate a ready-made response. Maybe I have an opinion on the subject, maybe not, but a sometimes I don’t even check with my brain & gut to see what they have to say. My subconscious fishes for an easy answer, and that is what comes out of my mouth. I don’t do this as a coping mechanism, nor do I do it to avoid the vulnerability I so crave. I’m not sure why it happens half of the time, but I do know that sometimes it is the result of not working on my soul; digging, thinking, mulling, wrestling with hard truths, & fighting for what is right. If I haven’t done that work myself, then I get lazy in the midst of conversation. I think we are all guilty from time to time, but that doesn’t make it right.
An adopted opinion makes us lazy in relationships. Not that we must have a completely original thought every time we open our mouths (there is nothing new under the sun, remember? Ecc. 1:9), but making that our go-to means we aren’t truly connecting with the people we are talking to. We aren’t baring our souls, letting them into the dark crevices that are messy & unkempt.
They will see the dirty laundry piled in the corner of our minds, the one that claims insecurityabout not being a good enough wife, mother, person, etc.They will see the mound of dishes in the sink, the dishes that reveal the fear in forgiveness,because once you forgive someone, is it forgotten & not justified? If you are not justified, does that mean that you are alone, without a person to look out for you?
Unmade beds that tell of depression, that reveal wonderings of why everyone else seems to have their lives “together,” while you are still a mess day after day?If you show these corners of your life, there will inevitably be tears, wiping away any ideas of you being a strong, capable woman. And with all that is going on in your soul & heart, the image of you being steady-headed, emotionally stable person is really all that you have to hold on to, all that gets you through the day-to-day.
It is in these dark hours of the soul that we wrestle & fight. We see all of our imperfections, and we resolve to not let them bury us. We wrestle to figure out where we really stand & who we really are; we don’t settle for the image of ourselves that we know deep-down isn’t accurate.
It has taken me years to learn how to wrestle for myself, & I am still in the process of finding the real me behind the facade. It is an ongoing journey. I have found that if I don’t take time away from distractions & people, and if I don’t take some time to learn how to be alone with myself and my thoughts, that I do indeed revert back to my old ways of regurgitated opinions.
In these moments that I take with myself, I learn how to be unapologetically me. In prayer & searching the Word I find Truth, a truth that I cannot find anywhere else. In reading & taking in my surroundings, I develop thoughts & opinions. I learn what I am passionate about & what really doesn’t matter. Voices are quieted, & I can re-enter the world with a quiet assurance.
Liberally applying aged cheddar to this apple galette was one of those things for which I will not apologize.After making a couple apple hand pies for the Hubs & I, I found myself with extra crust & extra filling. I have never made a galette before, but knew it as basically a rustic tart of sorts. Basically the scraps of a post-pie experience put to good use.
Buttermilk pie crust is always somewhat of a star, because a brilliant pie crust cannot be beat. Filled with slightly sweetened cinnamon apples, plus grated cheddar to cover the entire thing (a little bit just wouldn’t do, because of obvious reasons), it was baked to a sweet, slightly savory perfection. Cheese & apple will always be a lovely pairing, in my books.
This weekend, steal a few moments for your soul. Make this galette & ruminate on what is in your soul. Ignore what other have to say, & figure out what you
have to say about your life. Time is tooprecious
to be run by the speculations of others.Apple Cheddar Galette
makes 2 – 7inch galettesfor the crust:
1 stick (4 ounces) cold unsalted butter, cut in 1/2-inch cubes
1 1/4 (6 ounces) cups all purpose flour
1 1/2 tsp. granulated sugar
1/2 tsp. sea salt
1/4 cup (2 1/2 – 3 ounces) cold buttermilk
(I usually double the recipe & freeze half so I’ll have pie crust on hand in a pinch. If doing this, simply weigh dough & half if. Wrap one half of the dough in plastic wrap, making sure it is all sealed so it doesn’t dry out, and freeze.)
2 sticks (8 ounces) cold unsalted butter
2 1/2 (12 ounces) cups all purpose flour
1 Tablespoon sugar
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup (5 to 6 ounces) cold buttermilk
for the filling:
3 medium sized apples (I used ambrosia, but can also use granny smith)
1/2 teaspoon of lemon juice
1/3 cup of sugar
pinch of sea salt
2 teaspoon of all-purpose flour
1/2-1 scant teaspoon of cinnamon
for the topping:
egg wash (1 egg, lightly scrambled in a ramekin)
ramekin of water
1 -1 1/4 cup sharp cheddar cheese
Sift together the flour, sugar and salt in a large bowl. Take the cold butter from the freezer and toss it with the flour mixture. Using a pastry cutter, quickly cut the butter into the flour mixture until it is about the size of peas, then working quickly, use your fingers to break up the rest of the butter until it resembles large oat flakes. Make a well in the center of the bowl, and dump your cold buttermilk. Using a fork, start to scrape the flour from the sides of the bowl into the buttermilk in the middle of the bowl. After about 10-15 seconds of this, dump onto a lightly floured surface. Gently fold and bring together with your hands. The dough will be quiet shaggy, so you can use another 1/2-1 Tbsp. of buttermilk if needed. The dough will be rough and hard to shape together, but once they rest in the fridge for a bit, they will be easier to roll out. Chill for an hour in the fridge.
Meanwhile, make your apple filling. Peel and quarter apples, Remove core, then dice. Toss the diced apples with the lemon juice. Add the sugar, flour, salt, & cinnamon and toss with the diced apples. Set aside.
Preheat oven to 375F.
Okay, now…remove your pie dough from the refrigerator and let it sit on the counter for 2-3 minutes. Divide in two equal parts. Roll each dough out to a 1/6-inch thickness. Heap the apple filling into the center of each dough round (it doesn’t have to be perfectly round or even! the more rustic, the better). When each of the crusts are filled, carefully fold the edges of the crust over the apples, being sure not to cover them entirely. If you go around the edges folding in, the crust will flop over each other beautifully. You can use the water to slightly “glue” the crust to each other. When you have finished with one, repeat with the second galette.
After each galette is folded and shaped, move to a cookie sheet covered with parchment paper. Brush the crusts with the egg wash. Apply grated cheese liberally to each galette. Put in fridge for 15-20 minutes, allowing them to rest & chill.
After they are done chilling, place in oven for 20-28 minutes (this will vary on your personal oven; I have a gas oven, and mine took about 26 minutes), or until golden brown. Check after 20 minutes, then decide how much longer they need. Let cool on parchment for 5 minutes, then move to a cooling rack to finish cooling. Or eat while they are still warm! Enjoy thoroughly.
Source: inspired by a cozy kitchen
Listening to: Death Cab for Cutie